Summer beginnings

Well the South has had one scorcher of week or two. It's not officially Summer and we're already feeling like the humid days of August. Bleech. On days like those I miss Northern California foggy days.

Summer is off to a rip roaring start for our family...so rip roaring that I sense it's going to fly by at a breakneck pace. This was week one of Summer Vacation for Sofie. She spent the mornings at Duke Soccer School for Girls (isn't that a funny name?) The first few days were a pleasant 100plus degrees, but by Friday it was a chilly 90 degrees. She seemed to enjoy it, so that made me happy. She had a variety of child care providers this week, but seemed to have fun since it always seemed to involve swimming.

The next five weeks are spent at Camp Riverlea...her third summer. We went to the open house today. What an awesome place! No wonder it's the most popular summer camp in Durham...or the hardest to get in due to repeat customers. The place is expansive and I totally understand why she's tuckered out by days end.

A quick rundown of the remainder of summer reads like this. Fly to Chicago with Sofie to pass over to David and Dawn (Debra's bro and sis-in-law) so they can fly the remainder of the way to CA for the beginning of Camp California/Camp Sofie. (A perk for me is spending the weekend in Chicago and having adult fun time!!) Upon return from CA, it's her 8th birthday. Followed by a week of random activities, then her beloved Camp Kesem!! Back for a week long camp at ERUUF, then she starts her new school year at her new school! See, summer will be overwith in a flash!!

In my other world...work...news abound. My company was sold...again. We've come full circle, going from small family run company through iterations of mega information conglomerates back to family run company who want and need us and are willing to invest in us. I will no longer working for "the man" so much. My coworkers all seem to be feeling good about this. I just hope that when the lease runs out, we move closer to Durham! Fingers crossed. My boss left the company so now I'm reporting to my old boss. All seems well, otherwise.

I've finally been utilizing babysitters and going out with friends and having child free fun. I'm enjoying it...Sofie? Not so much. I've noticed a change in her mood since I've started having adult only time. I'm sure it'll be fine...we have great babysitters...she just really ends up missing me at bedtime. Bedtime...that's another issue I'm too tired to write about. Just know it's a struggle and we're working on it.

Chillin' at the condo and more

Sofie and I had a very intentional low-key weekend. She seems a bit more tired these days...maybe I'm projecting, but it is how it seems. I picked her up from Debra's after an early morning appointment on Saturday. We gathered her clothes and various animals she decided to bring and off we headed.

First stop was Chapel Hill to pick up her very colorful painted sculpture of Scooby-Doo from Paint the Earth. I had no idea you could get so many different colors on one statue!


Isn't he colorful?!?!

On the short drive from Durham to Chapel Hill, she fell asleep in the car. See! More tired! After picking up Scooby, we headed back to Durham. I had no plans at all, I was just playing it all by ear.

Since it was lunchtime, I asked Sofie if she'd like to stop and get lunch at Red Robin...one of her favorite places to eat(they have cartoons on the TV monitors!) She didn't seem that into it, so I suggested picking something up and going home and just chillin' out. She seemed all for that. I even let her pick the restaurant...why was I not surprised when she picked Biscuitville! She's becoming the most Southern girl via California by way of Ukraine. She's even developing the cutest Southern accent...only on certain words, though.

Our afternoon included watching a bit of TV, playing her V-Smile video game, and rebuilding her T-Rex Mountain, which is really hard when there's no instructions(and a few pieces missing.) She's kind of out of her dinosaur phase, but she wanted to use it as a habitat for her animals(lions, cheetahs, alligator/crocodile and tigers...yes, I realize they don't live together, but she insists.) She's WAY into animals. No dolls for this girl. She's very clear about that fact. She even hates commercials about dolls...especially when I joke that Santa is going to bring her a pile of dolls for Christmas because he knows how much she loves them! Don't tell her but I think Santa is going to bring her a cool zoo with animals to replace the trains(that's she's no longer into) on her great train table. Santa's going to have a LOT of work to do Christmas eve to set that zoo up!

After the afternoon of just chillin' at the condo, we headed over to Emma and Jacob's to play and hang out while their mom's went to a party. We were joined by Taylin and her mom's, too. It was initially crazy noisy, but Donetta(Taylin's firm yet fun mom) got all the kids in order while Elizabeth(Tay's other mom) and I just sat there with our hands over our ears and pained looks on our faces. (That's only a slight exaggeration, too.) I have no idea how parent's can have more than two kids without going crazy or deaf with the noise level! (Can you tell I'm an only child raising an only child?)

Sunday we slept in...until 830a! I'd promised her a game of "Tickle Tackle"...honestly I didn't know what it was, but she's been bugging me to play ever since we got back from Minneapolis. Kim played a rousing round with Sofie and Zander while I was sick in bed. If you're really ticklish, I recommend you not play. However it is extremely funny hearing the giggles come out of a child, especially when she's tickling her mom! We played most of the morning away and headed out for Brunch with Sofie having her standard pancake, bacon AND sausage.


The girl LOVES bacon!!

After Brunch, we headed to the local AMF bowling alley for the Fall Reunion of Camp Kesem campers, counselors and family. Check out Sofie bowling. She has a style NOT to be missed!


I have to say, it's always nice to hear good things about your kid, but I'm telling you the counselors just gushed over Sofie and what a great girl/camper she was...especially since it was her first time at sleep away camp. I told them about the comment she made about wanting to be a CIT at Kesem when she's older. There was a collective, "Awwwwwwww!" heard round the alley. Bean, Sofie's cabin counselor was there. We all bowled a game. It was nice spending time with such a giving group of young adults. You can see how it really touches them to see the kids again. I'm looking forward to the Spring Reunion and Sofie's looking forward to next summer for her week at Camp. (Remember, it's free for the campers. If you're feeling in the giving spirit, please click on the link at the top of the page and make a donation to help this wonderful group continue.)


Sofie, Mama Jamie and Bean after a successful bowling adventure


The rest of Sunday was pretty simple. A trip to Sam's Club, back to Debra's where Sofie and I watched the first Scooby-Doo live action film. She giggled a lot, so that was good. We had dinner, cuddled on the bed with Mama Debra and I read and tucked her in for the night. I keep wanting to pinch myself...do I really get to parent such a great kid? I just love her so much and I'm looking forward to seeing what kind of grown-up she becomes...but just not YET!! We still have years for that.

Tears of concern

Sofie's teacher recently emailed to let us know that Sofie had been whiny, emotional and inconsolable of late. We chalked it up to being a side effect of her new ADHD medication and said we'd check in with her doctor on her next appointment. I also forwarded the information on to Sofie's therapist, to see if she could shed some light on the situation. Boy, did she enlighten me tonight.

It seems that our little miss is concerned that "something" is going to happen while she's at school. That "something" being related to mine or Debra's health. You may remember that when she was at Camp Kesem, her bunk mate's father died while she was at camp. That memory has stuck with Sofie and anxiety is building in her little psyche. Her therapist also noted that her "play" during therapy was way too organized for Sofie. She said that she's hyper-organizing to keep order in her life...a sure sign of anxiety. Her recommendation...encourage messiness in play!! I certainly don't mind that, heck I'm a great role model for clutter and chaos. Debra will probably have a harder time with that one.

The important lesson with all of this is that it's still very important for us to be as upfront and honest as we can with Sofie. Her strength, security and stability come partially from the fact that we've been so forthcoming with her. She knows that Mama Debra isn't getting better and that she may have to be treatments forever. We haven't had a more serious talk than that, yet. I'm sure we'll have many more discussions with her and help her try to make sense of it all. Hell, we need to try to help US make sense of it all. Our girl is becoming so grown up and clued into what's happening.

Camp "Magic"

Today, Debra, Fairygod Barbara(Sofie's godmother) and I drove to pick up Sofie from her week at Camp Kesem. We speculated on the drive there that she probably had a wonderful time and may not want to leave! I certainly missed her this week, but I know this had such potential to be a wonderful experience for her.

We got to camp a few minutes before noon as other families were in various states of arrival. I headed over to the area to collect Sofie's things and one of the counselor's said, "Sofie's mom, right?" Wow, how did she know. Was it the two mom thing? Didn't really matter to me, she knew who we were and that's really all that mattered. After putting her belongings in the car, the three of us started the hike back to the Dining Hall where all the kids were gathered, waiting on their family members. We passed Bean, Sofie's counselor, walking the other direction. She pointed to us and said, "Sofie's parents!!" It's so incredible to feel so welcomed. It's a nice camp, too. The rest of the year it's a Girl Scout camp so that had everything Camp Kesem could ever need for their camp.

Upon arrival at the dining hall, a few kids were sneaking out to meet their parents as they patiently waited in the heat to sign their kids out. The counselors got wise to that and stopped letting the kids escape. I stepped out of line, letting Debra stand there amongst the crowd to sign Sofie out. I kept peeking though the door, trying to get my own sneak peek at our snake girl. No longer capable of containing my excitement of seeing her, I went inside ahead of Barbara and Debra. I immediately spotted Sofie laughing and giggling with other campers. When she spotted me, she shouted, "Mommy!" ran over me, jumped into my arms and asked if I was the one picking her up? I gave her a big hug and assured her that Debra was coming inside soon. She proudly showed me a plate that Bean, her counselor, decorated awarding Sofie the "Most Expressive Expressions" award! Very cute.

The Dining Hall was mayhem, but nothing but love and happiness filled the air. All the kids were so happy to see their family members and I'm sure the feeling was very mutual. Another counselor, Glitter, came over and introduced herself to me and Debra. She said she spent a ton of time with Sofie since she was the counselors for 8-9 year old girls and apparently the 6-9 year range did a lot of things together. Her comments seemed to be part of a common thread from other counselors. Sofie was funny, fun, loved snakes, was a great swimmer and had a great time this week. That was so reassuring for both of us.

When asking Sofie what the green wristbands meant, she beamed telling us the answer. It meant she was a good enough swimmer to go into the 12 foot water...TWELVE foot, she said. All the counselors commented on her swimming abilities...especially for her age group. Our girl loves the water...part dolphin I believe. Sofie shared other fun stories about her experience. She literally couldn't be still as she was so excited to see us and thrilled to share in her good time.

While sitting for lunch, Bean shared her stories about Sofie. I had asked if there were any tears or a hard transition in the evening. She reported Sofie did fabulously. In fact, one of the camper's in her cabin had a parent that was *really* sick...near death. So the little girl was crying and worried. Our little empathetic, compassionate girl was so kind and caring towards her. Telling her that her mom was fighting cancer and maybe he'd be okay. (Unfortunately, the little girls parent died while she was at camp.) Bean said that after Sofie gave her pep talk to the little girl, there was nothing more for her as a counselor to say. That's our girl. You just can't teach that level of compassion. We model and hope she's kind to the world, but this goes above and beyond what a seven year old would be expected to do. We're so very proud of her.

Bean told funny stories about Sofie and commented on what a smart girl she is. How quickly she picked up on things. We've always known she was smart, it's just really great to hear it for others. She also said she was well behaved with only a few encounters that all surrounded having to wear sneakers and socks! As we left, Bean gave us all four a big hug. That told me right there that she had connected with Sofie and in turn Sofie was in great hands and probably had the time of her life. I can't wait til she gets to go back next year...and the year after that!

I would encourage all of you to learn more about Camp Kesem. BTW, Kesem means "magic" in Hebrew, so if definitely was "Camp Magic" for all that attended...and volunteered. Camp Kesem is becoming a national organization and needs your $$ and support. If your interested in donating to the organization or a specific camp, click here to donate. This camp is specifically for children of cancer patients and best of all...it's FREE. The organization is growing by leaps and bounds and have approximately 21 campuses involved in camps all over the US. So many kids benefit from their generosity and so many counselors spend the time of their lives working in this magical environment. Help them spread the magic if you can.

Sofie at Camp

We dropped Sofie off at Camp Kesem yesterday. Debra wrote about it, so I'll just post a picture of her and her counselor, Bean.

One in Three

When you're diagnosed with Cancer your life changes forever. And anyone who challenges that who hasn't been diagnosed or touched by cancer, I beg to differ. Last night, I spent time researching support offerings for kids who have a parent with Cancer. I saw a segment on The View yesterday about a young woman who, as an adult, started a club for kids who have lost a parent to Cancer. Her story was inspiring and made me wonder about other types of support for kids with ill parents. We've already got the ball rolling for Sofie to attend Camp Kesem this summer. Fingers crossed that she gets selected. Camp Kesem is a sleep away camp for kids who have a parent with Cancer. Kesem, by the way, is the Hebrew word for "magic"...and it sounds like this camp is a magical experience for all the kids that attend. I just wonder if we're doing enough for her right now.

This morning, I read a book review in the New York Times Health Section about a book called One in Three. The author was inspired to write it after his father died from Cancer. The title refers to the fact that one in three of us will develop Cancer within our lifetime. I don't know where that fact comes, but it sounds correct to me. The book sounds like it has interesting historical and personal stories around this illness. However, I doubt I'll read it right now. Living it is enough for me at this point.