All in a year

A year ago today I wrote my last (for a whole year) entry to this blog. Very unintentionally, though. There were thoughts of taking the summer off from writing, then that turned into a few more weeks. Well, those weeks became months and here we are...a whole year later. Amazing a year has flown by so quickly.

To break it down, we've been busy learning, growing, parenting(me), traveling, experimenting, dating...a tad(me, again), playing, loving and making it all work!

Let's see if I can do quarterly synopses.

Summer 2009-

Sofie-Nana's, Camp Red Clover, Y Camp, Kayak Camp, Camp Barbara and Jacque, Camp California and more Y Camp. Gets a kayak for her birthday!



Jamie- Work, Work, more work, attempt to date but fails, work, organized a Durham Bulls game with friends, little trip to Austin TX in 103 degree heat!!, kayak with Sofie.



Fall 2009

Sofie - Enters 3rd grade at her wonderful elementary school, still hates reading, still loves sciences, purports to hate/not understand math, played soccer, spent time with Grammy and PePaw while mommy had adult time! Learned to ride her bike!!!



Jamie - Work, attempted to date but failed again, friend I hadn't seen since high school visited from Idaho, weekend getaway with friends to mountain(sans kidlet)

Winter 2009/10

Sofie - continued making great progress in 3rd grade, had first Christmas at home with tree and everything, got strep throat(gave it to me), had adenoids removed, hamster died(the day before her surgery!!)

Jamie - Gallbladder removal, hernia repair on a two for Tuesday surgery special, had first full sized Christmas tree in YEARS and truly got into the Christmas spirit(kids will do that to even the biggest scrooge!), had strep throat and survived the first surgery of my child.

Spring 2010

Sofie - still hates reading, still loves science, lukewarm on math, loves to draw and continues to be reptile/amphibian obsessed(hasn't lessened since she was 4!!), Spring Break travel to CA where we did touristy things, skipped soccer for Spring season(or as she called it, she "took a break"), went on her very first camping trip!



Jamie - Work, work, work, travel to CA with Sofie and a friend from TX joined us for the week, traded in the Mom van for a cooler Honda Element, bought a kayak, took the kidlet on her first camping trip!

Summer 2010 is just starting and Sofie has a busy summer! She'll be away from home more this summer than ever before. A total of 6 1/2 weeks spread over the summer. I'll miss her like crazy while enjoying some ME time!!

It is my intention to write more frequently. I hope the inspiration and discipline are back!!

Sofie and Jamie's Excellent California Adventure (Part 2)

Day two-Santa Cruz to Brisbane

After having a lovely first night of Hanukkah with Laurie and Maya, plus a nice visit with Alan, we went to bed fairly early to play "catch-up" on our sleep. From Laurie's house you can see the Santa Cruz Boardwalk which had absolutely no activity while we were there. However, right beside the boardwalk is the pier that houses many sea lions lazing on the pylons underneath the pier. I know this because at 3a, I woke up to barking...not dog barking, sea lion barking. Later in the day Laurie, Sofie and I headed down to explore the pier and allow Sofie to snap some photos.

It was a beautiful, sunny day with a brisk breeze blowing about. The sea lions were contently perched beneath the traffic of holiday shuffling. Is it me, or do you think this sea lion is posing?!?!(Notice the catty glance upwards towards Sofie.)

It was also quite breezy that day. To my surprise, Sofie actually admitted she was cold! We meandered on the not so crowded pier, shopped a bit, had hot chocolate, then off to Laurie's for packing up the car but not before we saw this as we were leaving:

Yep, that's a seagull with a starfish hanging out of it's mouth, seemingly stuck in the bird's gullet. There was discussion in the car wondering if we should pull the starfish out of the sea gull's mouth. (As if that bird would have stayed there waiting for one of us to grab it around the body and yank it's dinner out of its' mouth!) I was worried that it couldn't swallow the meal, since it was probably only slightly smaller than the bird. We witnessed it try, with no success, to swallow. In the end, we left poor Gully to fend for himself. Maybe the pelican could help him out!

After fun in Santa Cruz, Sofie and I packed up the car and headed Northwest to Brisbane to visit the Wexler's and share in second night of Hanukkah. It was rainy, foggy and nearly dark when we were finally on the freeway heading north. If I uttered these words once, I uttered them a dozen times..."Yay, traffic...one thing I really don't miss about the Bay Area!" Sofie agreed, but alas we were on the road again!

It was dark by the time we arrived at the Wexler's home. Parking(another thing I don't miss) was a pain. There were teenage boys with fake guns(I hope) running around their street playing some sort of laser tag or non-paint paintball. At some point, Becky and Wex came out and instructed me to park in their driveway. Which I happily obliged with the rental car fully blocking the sidewalk. As we went inside, I was just hoping the teenagers were kind to the cars.

Walking into the Wexler house I always get a warm fuzzy feeling. With a chef in the house, there are usually wonderful smells wafting about. That night was no different. Naomi, the eldest Wexler child(who is actually a freshman in college) was making a heaping pile of latkes. Sofie and Tamar(the youngest Wexler) immediately went off to play, so I enjoyed chatting with Becky, Wex, Naomi and Nathan(the middle Wexler.) We caught, reminisced about prior visits that had included Debra. (One day I really have to write about the time Debra and I took Nathan and Naomi to Los Angeles to see Lion King on stage and a day at Universal studios. It was less than a month after 9/11 so we experienced airline travel in its utmost fearful state. With all that was going on in the world, we managed our own "Escape to L.A." for a wonderful trip with fun memories including losing Nathan at Universal Studios...but I digress!)

We lit the menorah, discussed the meaning of Hanukkah. Afterward, we sat for dinner. A lovely dinner with tasty food. A dinner where Ms. Picky eater ate a plate of turkey...that's it, turkey. Whatever. I enjoyed every morsel. We chatted more thru dinner. Nathan talked about getting the part of "Mark" for the local community theatre only to have the play yanked from any community theatre production. Bummer. He's such a talented guy. Luckily, they had a DVD of his recent performance as the Master of Ceremonies in his high school performance of "Cabaret." I'm amazed every time I see him on stage. Keep an eye out for him...or his sister, Naomi. The Wexler family is bursting with talent. Naomi is a gifted singer and studying music in college. Tamar seems to be the athlete of the family, something she and Sofie had in common.

By 9p I felt as if I'd hit a brick wall. I needed to sleep, right then! Originally we were supposed to drive to Palo Alto and stay at Debra's mom and sister's house. Fortunately, the Wexler's rearranged and Sofie and I slept like logs in Nathan's bed.

We snuck out of the house around 730a to head to Palo Alto. Nancy, Sofie and I were heading into San Francisco to spend some time at the newly re-opened (after years of being closed for renovation) California Academy of Science in Golden Gate Park.

Since that was such a long day, I'll continue on with that day in Part III of our adventure...soon.

Sofie and Jamie's Excellent California Adventure (Part 1)

Flight Day (aka...day from hell!)

Saturday started off in a fairly normal fashion. The guy who's installing the wood stove stopped by to take measurements and transport the other one over to Mary and Rebecca's. Of course this wasn't before he told me the inside of the old one needs many parts replaced(I always wondered why that internal wall was bowing inward!!)

After wood stove guy left, I rushed to finish packing and making sure all was well with the animals. Fresh litter, water and food. After a few hours of that, Annette and Angela came by to transport us to the airport. Big shout out to them for airport transportation. It was much appreciated!!

Finally we're at RDU awaiting our JetBlue flight to JFK where we were to (at a leisurely pace) transfer to another JetBlue flight to Oakland. Well, this is where the story *really* begins! Upon checking our bags, we were advised our flight was delayed out of RDU to JFK. The timing put us precariously close to departure time out of JFK to OAK. Egads. That was the last flight out of JFK, so we really needed to make that flight!!

Sofie and I proceeded to the airport bar for a drink a late lunch since we had time to kill. After a million dollar burger we meandered towards our gate only stopping to caress and drool over the latest Webkinz display strategically placed right in the walking path of every child!! Sofie asked, I said No, too close to Christmas and that's all that was said. The drooling and pawing over the ones she doesn't have didn't stop but I didn't have to hear about it!



We arrived at our gate, found our "comfortable" chairs...NOT. And proceeded to wait. I had to laugh every time Sofie complained about an out of hand, loud, whiny child and remind her that she was once that young, too. After a wait that seemed an eternity, we boarded our flight to JFK. (In hindsight, we had NO idea what an eternity felt like until we boarded the flight from JFK to OAK.) The flight from RDU went smoothly. We almost had to wait on 14 unaccompanied minors to deplane first...FOURTEEN!!!! Luckily the ground grew made the call of returning to get them once we had deplaned. Whew! I was still concerned we were going to miss our flight to Oakland. Once we landed, we dashed off the plane and luckily found our departing gate just across the aisle! Unfortunately we didn't get to spend any time exploring the fabulous new T5 JetBlue terminal at JFK. Maybe we'll see a bit on our way home.



The departing flight was delayed a little but we were settled in on the flight by 8p. The flight attendants said that shouldn't change our arrival time of 1030p by much. They couldn't have been more wrong. After sitting on the tarmac for an hour waiting to be de-iced we finally started our journey towards the West Coast. Normally it's a five hour flight time but we weren't that lucky that night. After take-off, the captain came on reporting strong(160-200mph) headwinds so we were going to fly a little north to miss those winds. Visualize a straight line from JFK to OAK, then think a little north. Does that area include CANADA? MINNESOTA? a DAKOTA?!?! I didn't think so. But there we were a little airplane on the screen crawling towards the west coast. That "little bit north" flying required a stop in Salt Lake City to refuel. Oh, joy!



I have to say, Sofie was a dream during all of this. When she got bored with watching Animal Planet on the TV in front of her face, she colored. After that she slept some. Only a few times did she ask if we were there yet. When I showed her the map, she decided for the duration of the flight she'd keep that on her screen so she wouldn't have to ask me every five minutes. Smart girl.



We arrived in Oakland at the very prompt hour of 130A! Only 3 hours late. Off to pick up baggage we go. We had a rental car that I'd pre-paid on Priceline.com, so transportation wasn't going to be an issue...or was it? The airport was relatively busy due to all the delayed flights. However, walking out to the transport area to the car rental lots might as well been a ghost town. (I swear I saw a tumbleweed roll by!) I called Hertz twice(and of course got two different answers) and tried Priceline but they were ringing busy. Sofie and I sat a little while longer, all alone, waiting on the bus for rental cars. Finally he showed up about 215a. He told us he had just dropped another family off at Hertz and hopefully they were still open. The rental lots are FAR away from the terminal!! Fortunately we got there and found one very nice gentlemen with his finger on the off light switch. He stayed, got us our car and off to Brenda's we went.



By this time I had been up 24 hours and I was exhausted. We got in our jammies, snuggled in B's very cozy bed and off to dreamland we went.


Day one-Oakland to Santa Cruz



We woke up STARVING. Realizing we had lived on that million dollar burger, pistachio's, water and whatever snack JetBlue provided for all of Saturday, we were hungry. Of course it was pouring down rain and I was going to be driving to Santa Cruz after that breakfast we were going to have. Lucky for us, Brenda left a 25% off coupon to Fenton's Creamery. When I lived here, I'd only had their ice cream but we decided to give it a try. So after showering and loading the car we headed to Piedmont Avenue for some breakfast. Upon arrival I was very surprised what I found...they have a PARKING LOT!!! We pulled right in, ran inside and had a yummy breakfast.



After breakfast we got back into our rental car to start our trip towards Santa Cruz. Not one to have bought into the whole GPS Navigation system, I was hesitant to use the one provided in the car. I would never have on for day to day living, but it's been a great asset for this trip and all the traveling to different locations we did. I plugged in Laurie and Maya's address and off we go. I did find myself arguing with the GPS lady and bucking the system a few times. Sofie was amused and enjoyed watching the map on the screen.

After an hour and a half or so, we arrived at their front door. We chilled out and just caught up most of the day. Alan showed up since he was leaving for Seattle that night...or so he thought. At some point Laurie, Maya and I went out for groceries while Alan and Sofie played indoor mini-golf. Later we cooked and ate dinner, said our goodbyes to Alan, then we lit the menorah. After that it was bedtime for us so we crawled into the bed Laurie graciously gave up for us to sleep in. What a good nights sleep we got. Enough to prepare us for our next days adventures!

(to be continued)

The Mouse vs The White House?

Below is an entry I posted on my Facebook page. I realize not everyone is on Facebook, so I'm re-posting on my blog:

About a month ago, my friend Sandy and I decided it would be great for our families to take a trip to Disney. I certainly didn't want to go solo and her family added playmates for Sofie, quality time with friends and possible bit of downtime for me. Plus it's a week in the happiest place on earth, right? We picked a week based on when our girls had a little time off school , then the parents scheduled time off work. All felt right and we'd spend time having fun in Florida without mosquitoes or crowds!

Then I realized I was crazy for thinking I could afford this with 2 mortgages, taxes, etc. to pay. I was simply living an unreal pipe dream. Fortunately I knew better than to even remotely mention this to Sofie, so no disappointment there! Besides, she's seen the mouse more times in her 8 years than I have in my 43!! So, I let it go. Election Day happened and ALL was right with the world. I quickly realized I had the week of the inauguration off and no plans to head to Mouseland. Well, my head starting spinning with possibilities. Could we head to DC and witness history? I quickly put out feelers for places to stay. There was a firm bite on my first cast. My dear friend Rick quickly and graciously offered his guestroom in Baltimore. We'd landed the big fish so how could we not go?

Two days ago, Sandy called with an incredibly generous offer. She and her husband Rick(not the same Rick in Baltimore!) would pay upfront for our trip and we could pay them back. There began the whirling and spinning in my head.

History with huge crowds VS Fun with no crowds?
History witnessed with good friends VS Fun experienced with good friends?
Basically free week of fun, learning and history VS an greatly reduced, but still quite expensive week of fun?
Did I mention witnessing history?

I'll admit that even when I posted the poll to masses, my mind was leaning very far towards the witnessing history aspect. I'm a nerd at heart and I really want Sofie to experience DC in many positive ways. What better way to start than, let me hear it, WITNESSING HISTORY!!! I was just giving the mouse another chance. To see if anyone could sway me. Arguments were good and points were well taken. After sleeping and processing and processing and sleeping I've come to the conclusion that....drum roll, please.................................................

The White House wins!!!!!

Sorry Sandy(and family) but I gotta go with my gut on this one. Disney will always be there and someday we will all make a trip there. Just not the week of January 18th, 2009.

Angela said it best, I don't have a picture of the mouse as my profile picture, so Obama it is! (The image is just below.)


Even if I'm planted in front of a TV in the DC Metro area, watching the inauguration in the company of friends, we will still experience the positive energy rolling into DC and the heavy, weighted energy rolling out. We will go to the parade. We will see museums. We will spend time with friends I haven't seen in forever. We will feel the HOPE and experience the CHANGE!

Sorry Mouse, we'll catch ya later.

UPDATE:

I told Sofie of January adventures to DC, the inauguration, the museums, just the overall experience in DC. DC is one of my favorite cities to visit and making it a fun place for Sofie is most important for future visits. She could hear the excitement in my voice and asked many questions. How many times have you visited? What's your favorite place? Is the museum like the one in Night at the Museum(I had just mentioned the Natural History museum and all it's glory)? The question that gave me a warm fuzzy feeling all over...Can I take my camera?!?! (Said with much enthusiasm) What a cool kid I have.

Parenting Holiday - Day One

Today is officially the first day of a two week parenting holiday provided by a fine group of friends and family in Northern California! How am I spending that day? Right now, I'm sitting in an awesome hotel room in Chicago at Hotel Allegro waiting for my friend Kim to wake up so we can go downstairs for their complimentary coffee bar. However, I'm up at this ungodly hour because I woke up wonder if my dear daughter arrived safely in CA and how the rest of the trip went.

There's good reason to have that wonder, so let me fill you in. Sofie and I left NC yesterday around 2p EST on a Southwest flight with final destination(for me) as Chicago. Of course you know, with SW there's no such thing as a short flight anywhere! We had a quick flight to Nashville with an hour and a half to kill before the next flight. We left Nashville at around 4p CST arriving in Chicago around 530p or so. Our plans were to meet up with David, Dawn and family(Debra's brother and family) so Sofie could continue on with them to San Jose. While waiting at the baggage carousel, Dawn calls from the freeway with an update. Even after allowing PLENTY of time to get to the airport, the Friday afternoon traffic gods had other plans for them...first a huge accident, then weather and probably followed by other accidents!

In the meantime, bags are riding the conveyor belt round and round with nothing looking remotely like our bags. By this time Kim has arrived at baggage to meet us so she did a great job of entertaining/being entertained by Sofie while I did a sweep of the area to discover neither of our bags. Oh joy!! Lost bags(or as the SW agent said, "delayed bags")...whatever! I still didn't have either of our bags! Time was slipping by, Sofie had another plane to catch and neither bag was there. I filled out a report, having my bag sent to the hotel and her bag on the next flight to San Jose after the "delay" was no longer an issue. After that paperwork was finished the three of us headed upstairs to the ticketing area to wait. By this point Sofie was a little cranky due to thirst and hunger. Big kudos to Kim for taking her away to find a beverage while I was dealing with baggage issues. I had already bought her a big bag of popcorn from the Nuts on Clark store she spotted in the airport. My girl LOVES popcorn, so her tummy was okay and the crankies went away...but I fear this was only temporary.

The Friedlands arrived after a horrific commute in just in time to miss the plane. I made the quick decision(later regretting but knowing it was probably the right decision) to leave Sofie with them and make a clean, quick break. Dawn called a little later to say the put them on a flight to Oakland that would arrive at 1130p PST...that's 230AM in Sofie's little body. The were then going to have to rent a car there and drive to Palo Alto. Sofie was supposed to be picked up at San Jose by Laurie and Maya for the first leg of Camp California. The Santa Cruz leg has been delayed a day, but hopefully they'll get good time with her. Huge shout outs to the Friedland family for taking care of my girl and making sure she arrived in CA, safe and sound.

Meanwhile, Kim and I arrive at our hotel, check in and immediately look for dinner. We ended up a block or two away having deep dish pizza. Unfortunately they "pushed the wrong button" when entering ingredients into the computer so we were delay an extra 30 plus minutes it took to remake our pizza. It was okay, we just chatted and caught up on life. Laughing, crying and all the emotions in between. We've been in each others lives for 17 years(I think) and always have lots to say when we're together. She's a friend I value tremendously and I'm glad we get to have a little fun in Chicago!

So what's the fun going to be? Well, you didn't hear it hear, but I'm finally getting my second tattoo! Kim's cousin is a very fine tattoo artist in Chicago, so I'm going to see what he can come up with given the ideas I have. Kim's getting her's beautified. How cliche, right? Tattoo's on vacation! Well, that's how I got my first one. Debra and I were in Hawaii. That tattoo was a Valentine's Day gift from Debra so very special to me even today. Along with getting "tatted up" we're going to try to get tickets to Wicked or Blue Man Group for this evening. Fingers crossed it's Wicked!

In hindsight, I didn't plan enough time in Chicago but I will make the most of it...as soon as I have my coffee!

Traveling, grief and yelling

Life continues to be full of ups and downs...for both of us. We have mostly ups, but the downs can be really down. One thing I've noticed with Sofie is that anytime she gets her feelings hurt by anyone or anything it escalates and becomes more about Debra's death. My guess is this will happen for awhile. The other thing that's becoming harder to manage with her is the fact that she can't get to sleep at night. School starts in a few days so that's going to be fun!

My fuse is shorter than normal. Late last night after driving in the rain all day and still dealing with this cold, I yelled at Sofie. And of course she yelled back, "Stop yelling at me!!!!!" The situation was stressful...I was trying to get her into bed, she kept saying there was a smell in her room...of course I couldn't smell anything because of the cold. I told her I didn't smell it...then when I was fixing her comforter on her bed, there it was...a pile of cat poop! Well, that was the last straw. I asked Sofie to run and get some toilet paper...instead she kept saying, "See, I told you there was a smell" over and over again. I kept asking for toilet paper, each time my voice volume was escalating until I yelled, "GO GET ME TOILET PAPER NOW!!!" Finally, she brought the TP and I cleaned it off, got the comforter off the bed and got the extra comforter for her bed. She was mad because I was yelling, I was mad because I was yelling...and one of the cats pooped on her bed! Oy!

After running downstairs to put the comforter into the washing machine, I calmed down, went upstairs and snuggled into bed to read. She was over it by then but as you can tell, the guilt is still with me. I don't want to be that mom that yells. In fact, I've been working with her to not yell so much. That was her dynamic with Debra...I don't yell that much(unless stressed!) My normal chatting volume is low. I've explained yelling isn't appropriate. I want her tone to settle a bit. I read, she fell asleep, then I went downstairs to try to go to bed...but alas, I was up until after 1am. Our sleep schedules are shot! Must work on that.

We had a great weekend visiting my mom, my grandma and aunt, and my friend Sandy and her family. It rained most of the weekend which was a welcome site. Sofie and I drove back late yesterday afternoon after stopping for playtime with Sandy's kids. We got hungry for supper on the way home and instead of doing fast food, we decided to stop at a restaurant. The first available was Applebee's in Lexington, NC. While Sofie and I are waiting for service she draws on a piece of paper a picture of me, Debra and her. (She's been doing this A LOT since Debra's death.) When the waitress comes to take our order it goes something like this:

"I just drew my family. My mama Debra died."

The waitress with a combination of a horrified and sad look said, "I'm sorry about that."

At some point I interject, "I'm sure you weren't expecting that conversation, but she's right, her Mama Debra did just die."

"Who are you staying with now?" The concerned waitress asked Sofie.

Sofie points to me as I say, "Me."

"Who are you, her aunt or something?"

"Nope, her other mother."

"Oh, her other mother" with no change in expression.

She looks at Sofie, "Well all I can say is that I'm very sorry for your loss."

Then she took our order and was extremely kind to us the rest of the evening.

The rest of the drive was uneventful. We arrived home, I started laundry, Sofie played with her zoo until bedtime...then the yelling began. Hopefully, as we get settled in to our new routines and life, the yelling will subside.

Traveling girl memories

I've had a pretty emotional week. Some good emotions, some bad emotions. Some about work, some about life. It's been a roller coaster ride. I won't go through the drama of the ups and downs, but know that's why I haven't written much this week. I have, however, enjoyed a trip down memory lane this week so I thought I'd share some of those memories.

A couple of days ago, Dana over at Mombian posted a request for "Good Lesbian Travel Writing." Unfortunately I don't have anything to contribute on such short notice, but it did start me thinking about all the traveling I've done during my life. This week, Debra was graced with a visit from a long time pal, CJ. I was reminded of other fond travel memories by her visit, too. Since she lives in Colorado, I'm sure there will be other memories created if Sofie and I take a visit to see her in the mountains.

Traveling has always been something I've loved to do. I enjoy exploring new places, learning about other cultures/communities, playing in other peoples backyards, as it were. I've always thought it was because my ascendant in my astrological chart is Sagittarius...known lovers of travel. Could also be just my natural curiosity and love of seeing new places. Doesn't really matter, it's just one part of who I am.

For all of our differences, Debra and I always enjoyed and traveled well together. Many of my fondest memories involve trips that Debra made happen or had a big part in creating. CJ's visit sparked a walk down memory lane regarding my 30th birthday. Debra and I visited CJ and her then partner Lori in their home in Idaho. What I didn't know at the time was that they had planned a wonderful float trip down the Snake river on the day of my birthday. Unlike many people, higher altitude's give me a jolt of energy instead of the sleepy's like many flatlanders encounter when visiting the mountains. I attribute that factor to my genetic make-up...I come from mountain folk! Mountains have always seemed like home to me. One day, I will live in the hills again. On this trip, Debra experienced the sleepy's in a bad way! As we were gently floating down the beautiful Snake river and seeing sites that inspired Ansel Adams to take beautiful and breathtaking photos, Debra kept dozing off. Slyly, she was wearing sunglasses, so I don't think our guide new. We got a kick out of it, since I seemed to be on speed and she was slower...kind of like we traded places for the weekend. That entire trip made for my most memorable birthday experience to date. I may have to scan and insert some pictures for your enjoyment!

The other trip that I'd love to write a story or two about was our trip to South Africa. There are so many funny stories along with a multitude of life changing experiences. Seeing Nelson Mandela in person, witnessing a lunar eclipse of a full moon, waking up early and seeing the grounds surround our cabin covered with Nyala(their version of deer), watching the sunrise over the Indian Ocean and set over the Atlantic Ocean, being surrounded(literally) by a hundred elephants, eating food I never thought I'd eat(ostrich, chicken that tasted like fish, babootie, musk gum and passion fruit yogurt), eating some of the best Indian food I've ever had, seeing various wildlife in the actual wild, meeting and hanging with some very cool people, seeing the shanty towns that are on the outskirts of Cape Town, and hearing live music in downtown Cape Town. I could go on, but I'll save some things for stories to write later.

As we tread through the tough times ahead, I love that I have such wonderful memories to sustain me. I have great stories to tell Sofie about the life Debra and I had before she came along. At some point, I'll get to go with her on bigger adventures and share the love of travel that Debra and I so enjoy.

Mini Apple Is*

*(Mini Apple Is...the way Sofie would say Minneapolis for it to make sense to her)

Sofie and I are back from our whirlwind trip to Minneapolis. We had a great time. She and Zander were fast friends, although at some point she didn't quite "get" the antics of a three year old. The constant shouting "NO!", the bossiness, the possessiveness. I just had to explain that she was just like that when she was his age...and sometimes she can still possess some of those traits! They worked it out. When Zander took his afternoon nap, Sofie and I chilled out, too. It was a good trip, except for the pesky stomach bug I acquired sometime Saturday and am still dealing with the effects as I type this. Bleech.

Our flights to and from Minneapolis were about as easy as I've ever experienced flying. We actually arrived EARLY at both destinations. We spent about an hour in Chicago's O'Hare airport where Sofie had some energy to burn, so I had her run around paying special attention not to run into anyone. She did that for about 15 minutes, then settled down for me to read a Scooby book to her. We got on our connecting flight to Minneapolis, then arrived 1/2 hour early there, too. So, after getting our luggage and taking the tram to the rental car building, we were off to Kim and Cindi's house. The return flights were just as easy, with on-time flights all around. Easy traveling. Sofie amused herself with animals, drinking cups and gummi worms...don't ask!

Sofie was greeted with a welcome bag from Zander. The bag had Scooby Doo on the outside...as well as all things Scooby on the inside! She's now the proud owner of Scooby socks! Zander and Sofie were off to play in the great play area they have downstairs. Poor little Rowan, who's 10 months old, just couldn't keep up with the big kids. After awhile of playing, we settled the kids down and all were ready for bedtime.

After the wee ones were asleep, Kim and I sat up and chatted for awhile. Catching up. Just reconnecting. We talked about all that's happening and going to happen. As a mom, Kim could really identify with the grief and sadness that Debra is going through with regards to Sofie. It was sweet to see her so empathetic about this. She and Cindi are such good people...and dear friends.

Saturday morning we were welcomed with a hearty breakfast of biscuits and gravy(made with 1/2 and 1/2!!!), eggs and fruit. After filling our bellies with good food, Kim and I walked with the kids down to, as Zander says, "the blue park." We had so much fun! My photos are posted on Flickr for you to enjoy.

After lunch, the little ones took a nap and Sofie and I snuggled on the couch watching, you guessed it...Scooby Doo. I dozed on and off while she enjoyed her cartoons. When Zander woke up, they played...had a little altercation about a snake, then Sofie and I took a little outing to a great toy store. It was just what we needed, a little Mommy/Sofie time. Upon our return, we ate a quick dinner, then got dressed for the Halloween party.

Sunday brought a day of illness for me. I won't gross you with the details, but needless to say, I was not feeling well. Kim took Sofie and Zander to the YWCA for swim time, then Cindi joined them a little later after Rowen woke up from his morning nap. I enjoyed a bit of alone/quiet time. Although I'd rather have been swimming than feeling the way I did. I napped, then they came back, I was still napping so while the little ones took a nap, Kim and Sofie explored at another park. After the little ones woke up, I heard a rousing game of "tickle tackle" in the basement. Not sure what's involved but there was a ton of laughter!

Later in the afternoon, I got up, showered and everyone headed out to ChuckECheese. I tried to eat for the first time that day...bad decision. I promptly threw up when we returned. The kids snuggled down for Madagascar and popcorn, while I packed and called it an early night.

Sofie and I needed the time away and had a great time thanks to Kim and Cindi. I think from the pictures, you'll see she did.

This is my favorite picture of the weekend:

Out of town

Sofie and I are heading to Minneapolis for a fun weekend with Kim, Cindi, Zander and Rowen. It'll be a fun packed weekend with a Halloween party thrown in for good measure. I'm sure I'll have pictures and stories to write about upon our return. (It's a full moon, so here's crossing fingers for uneventful travel!!)

I'm just looking forward to the change of scenery and spending quality time with good friends.

Prepping for our trip

Since we've been having an unusually warm October, I felt I needed to prep Sofie for the fact that Minneapolis is not having an unusually warm October! What this truly means is NO shorts!! Yes, it's the end of October and we're still having weather warm enough for shorts. During the summer Sofie's biggest complaint is how cold the restaurants are. She's thin...not one ounce of fat on her bones...she gets cold pretty easily...and she's not very nice about it. Of course when offered a sweatshirt or something to warm her chilling body, she summarily rejects them. She's much happier whining about it. But I digress.

I wanted her to be aware of the pretty drastic temperature change for our upcoming trip this weekend. She didn't seem concerned and was in fact very pleased that her Scooby Doo costume was warm and fuzzy. Okay, maybe she'll be fine with natural cold...maybe it's the artificial cold she doesn't like. I mentioned it snows a lot in Minnesota. She beamed. The girl loves snow. Something we have so very much lacked the past few years. I, too, love snow. I've always dreamed of living in a place that's cold and snowy. (I'm sure those of you who have lived in places like that think that I'm crazy and that I'd actually hate it!) I have to disagree. I'm happiest when it's cold. Again, I digress.

Last night, after lights were out and I was lying in bed with Sofie. We were talking a little of our upcoming trip. I keep drilling her on the names of the people we're visiting. She loves that one of the little boys is called "Z"...that made her laugh. We did the Name Game song with all four of their names...hopefully at least one of the names will stick...she's not really great at names...she sometimes forgets names of kids in her own class. After I drilled her a little more, she pops out with the funniest question. "Mommy, do they speak English there?" Where do kids come up with this stuff? So, I had to help her visualize where, on the map, Minnesota was. That even though it borders Canada, it's still part of the US and yes, they mostly speak English there!

Cruise in a nutshell

Try as I may, I haven't had the time nor inclination to write long posts about our experiences on the cruise. So, I'm going to do a "highlights of" post for now. Realize this coming from someone who never thought she'd like cruises AND who detests hot weather almost as much as she detests the current administration.

Pluses

People-

I cannot say enough good things about the quality of people on the ship. From the crew to the guests everyone I encountered was pleasant, friendly and seemingly having the time of their lives. It was heart warming to see all the gay dads on board.

In an odd twist, Debra and I apparently switched part of our personalities somewhere between Manhattan and the boat. I don't know what happened. I was outgoing and meeting people left and right. I went up to people I didn't know and started conversations. (On a side note, if any of you saw the 20/20 special on transgender kids that aired a month or so ago, the family w/ the 11 yo twins was on board. I talked to the mom and thanked her for sharing their story. Of course, I had tears in my eyes as I spoke with her.) Debra hung out in a very low key way with our friend Laurie and new friend Sher(a friend of one of Debra's friends from SF) and her lovely pre-teen daughter, Max(whom Sofie adored!) Bizarro.

I met some really interesting people. Some with interesting lives, but most were normal everyday families, just raising their children (or trying to have/adopt children), worrying about the state of things in the country/world and living their lives like everyone else. A big shout out to my new Ohio friends who greeted me on the very first day saying they had read my blog and just wanted to see how we were doing. (If you guys are reading this, click on the email link on the front page and send me a note letting me know how you guys are doing. Sorry I didn't get your email before we left the boat!!)

Entertainment

For many people on the cruise this was a repeat performance, so to speak. In the days following the cruise many folks complained about the entertainment, just hoping that they'd mix it up a bit next time. For me, it was all new, so I thought it was incredible.

The comedians were hilarious...as they should be. There was Judy Gold, Alec Mapa(doesn't have a website?!?!) and Jessica Kirson. I'd seen, at least on TV, Judy and Alec, but what a surprise and treat Jessica was! As many have already stated about her, I laughed until I almost peed myself!! And of course there was Rosie. Seth, Micheal Lee and many others from the RFamily staff are comedians in their own right!

Broadway music was abound on board. One of my favorite parts of the cruise was the ending of the opening show, Rosie's Broadway Belters. Capathia Jenkins, from Martin Shorts:Fame Becomes Me sang her song, "Stop the Show" in which she proclaims "Yes, I have just one question/ Which I'll ask, if I may/ Why the hell did they name it/ the Great White Way?/ Cause if you want a hit/ learn what Sondheim doesn't know/ and let a big black lady stop the show!" What a fun song! You can actually see her perform it on a somewhat shaky You Tube here. We also got to see a kids version of Broadway Belter's doing songs from more kid friendly shows. Sofie, Debra and I all enjoyed it.

Other entertainment included Erasure, Euan Morton and Sandra Bernhard. I didn't make it to either of those shows so I can't personally comment, however all the buzz on the boat was excellent.

Workshops

Yes, workshops! Family Pride, a wonderful national organization fighting for our families rights, coordinated most of the on board workshops. They were insightful, informative and fun. Debra and I attended one on "Making Schools Safe" and boasted about our lesbian heavy PTA. We took turns attending other workshops, some informative and others just plain fun. One of my favorites was "Doing Voice overs presented by the voice of porky pig" Bob Bergen is name and he's a really nice guy. At one point in the cruise we chatted and although he doesn't do any of the voices for Scooby Doo, he delivered a nice attempt at Shaggy and Scooby for Sofie. She giggled and really enjoyed chatting with him. I think Debra enjoyed the workshop by Mitchell Gold on decorating. For this life long learner, it was great to have the opportunity to gather more information about things I may have not encountered in life.


Minuses/Neutral

Food

I have to say, the only "bad" part of the cruise for me was the food. So if you're looking for 7 days of fine dining, don't cruise. However, I think most people are in it for more than that!

The food wasn't bad, per se. It was mediocre. We did have some good meals and great service when we went to Aqua, one of their sit down restaurants. Everything else was average. Sometimes the service was poor to nonexistent. We actually left Blue Lagoon after waiting for quite awhile and never saw a waitstaff...and this was at NOON during lunchtime!! Garden Cafe was our staple due to the kids buffet. I got tired of having the same thing for breakfast everyday, but for Debra that was heaven since she got to have lox and bagels everyday. Sofie enjoyed the limitless amounts of sausage and bacon...and often out ate any adult in the room! I was happy to have fresh Muesli everyday.

Itinery

As stated above, I'm not a hot weather girl, so I was miserable with the heat, sun and lack of outside shelter. That didn't keep me from having a great time. It did cause me to stay inside more than I'd have liked. Glad next years cruise is heading north!

All in all, we had a great trip. People were worried that we might have issues staying in the same small cabin for a week. I can honestly say that's the furthest thing from the truth. Of course we had some issues, but what family doesn't?!? What was basic was the good time we intended/needed to have and how we accomplished that. I'm no longer a naysayer about cruising...however, I think I limit my cruising to RFamily vacations, where I know life is accepted and cherished for what it is. If you or your family are interested, please join us on next summers adventure to Canada, Maine, Massachusetts and Rhode Island!!

If you want to see pictures, just click on the links to the right, starting with "Cruisin' with Rfamily," all the way through "Towel Animals from the Cruise."

RFamily Cruise, part 1

Yesterday, our friends Maya and Laurie arrived early bird style at our hotel. They had taken a red-eye from California and needed a place to hangout before we all headed to the big boat. They were pretty tired upon arrival so Maya, teenager that she is, immediately cocooned herself into the bedspread and napped until just before we left. Meanwhile, the rest of us headed to Brooklyn Diner on 57th for a fabulous breakfast. I cannot say enough good things about the Blueberry pancakes with lemon zest...Yummy!! I made a very last minute decision to trash my large suitcase, as this was going to be it's last trip anyway. So before we went to breakfast I ran across the street and picked up two bags, one purple and one orange. This made my bags more noticeable and storage so much easier on the ship.

We weren't far from the terminal, but we did have 5 people with at least 8 bags!! However were we going to get to the port? Never fear, hotel guy was near!! He called a company that had those big ass SUVs. We piled into the SUV, luggage and all, and arrived safely at the port terminal. I can't imagine driving in NYC...chaos at it's best. After unloading our bags, finding a porter and being directed to proper place we started our cruise adventure. The lines weren't bad at all and moved quickly. We got to the desk and began our check-in process. It was a bit hectic as we didn't receive the proper papers to fill out before hand. Also, they kept Sofie's passport since it was from Ukraine. (She doesn't have her US Passport yet, so we had to use the Ukranian one...that was expired but no one seemed to notice!!) After finally checking in, we headed to the place where they take your picture, pre-cruise. We anticipated that, so we all wore our different variations of RFamily tees. Little did we know that the background was a green screen, so when we saw the pictures Debra head was floating without a body because she had on a green tshirt. Live and learn.

We'd been warned to bring a change of clothes because they weren't sure when we'd get to be in our rooms or when our luggage would arrive at our stateroom. Sofie wanted to cannonball into the pool...which she did, but was quickly told that there was no jumping in the pool!! We were able to get into our staterooms quite early and our luggage arrived a couple of hours later. I was hungry and cranky by mid afternoon, so I headed to one of the two restaurants that were open...Blue Lagoon. I actually almost walked right past it because it was so small. I've never thought of cubby's as being restaurants, but apparently size doesn't matter on the ship. I found a booth and waited and waited and waited. Finally, someone came took my order and I waited and waited and waited some more. (This was probably an exaggeration, but like I said, I was cranky and hungry!) The food was actually pretty good. Tomato soup and a burger.

The remainder of the day was low key. That evening we received our "FreeStyle Daily" which gave us the list of goings on, so I highlighted what I thought we'd each like to do, then gave it to Debra to see if she wanted to add something. Since this was our first cruise we had no idea if we'd actually get to attend any of the workshops, but we worked it out.

Today is Sunday, the first FULL day of the cruise and there was so much going on! After breakfast at the Garden Cafe, we dropped Sofie off at Kid's Crew(much to her disdain.) We wanted to attend the "Making Schools Safe" workshop that Family Pride created. It was an incredible workshop. Well organized and informative. I'm impressed with what Family Pride is doing for our families.

The afternoon was swimming with Sofie in the sea water pool...yick...yes, sea water! It was de-salinated but still salty and gross to taste and painful to get in your eyes! We're still getting in the groove of things, so by weeks end we'll probably have our regamine down pat!

The evening entertainment was "Rosie's Broadway Belter's." Laurie agreed to hang out with Sofie in the room while Debra and I attended the show. Sofie was tired from swimming and wanted no part of Kid's Crew. (This is going to be a problem, I can tell already!!) We were grateful to Laurie, but apparently it wasn't hard because Sofie slept and slept and slept. We ended up going to dinner after the show because Sofie woke up hungry. We trapse off to the Garden Cafe...again...for lovely buffet food.

Tomorrow is another day, so maybe we'll eat somewhere other than the Garden Cafe!! Oh, to wish.

New York, New York

We flew up to NYC to spend a few days in the city before heading out on the big boat. Thanks to Debra's friend Deb for the drop off at RDU this morning. It was greatly appreciated!!

For this first time flier of JetBlue, I have to say, I liked it. Everything was so simple and uneventful. Flight was smooth and Sofie's favorite thing was that each seat has it's own TV! The Flintstones entertained her for the entire flight. No amusing her necessary.

After arriving at JFK and gathering our bags, I suggested to Debra that we call the "sixes" for a ride to the hotel. (I'd gotten the recommendation off the rfamily forum I became obsessed with pre-cruise.) So, she called 212-666-6666 and arranged a comfy town car to pick us up. We had no idea what the wait would be, but he was there within 10 minutes. While waiting, we had a bit of a teary moment, first for Debra, then for me. Sofie was sitting atop the baggage and she wanted to sing "Seasons of Love" from Rent. She and I started singing it softly and I looked up a Debra and she had a moment and tears were in her eyes, which of course automatically brought tears to my eyes! She said to me, "Please keep doing that with her. Teach her to sing." I know what she was implying and that's bringing tears to my eyes as I type this. So for Debra, know there will ALWAYS be singing in Sofie's life while I'm around!

On Friday, we slept in until after 8am. I love the blackout curtains in a hotel!!! After chillin' for a bit, Sofie and I had her first subway adventure to the zoo. I forgot just how sticky and hot it is down in the subway...yuck. We hopped on our first train and hopped off at the next station, Central Park!! After coming above ground we got our bearings and headed toward the park. Once in the park, we quickly found the zoo. For those of you with kids, you probably know the zoo in the movie Madagascar is based on the zoo in Central Park. It looks very similar to the zoo in the movie and Sofie kept pointing that out to me. We went in to see if we could figure out who Roy, Milo and Tango were, but alas, there's no special placard pointing them out!! We were going to try to stay for the penguin feeding, but it smelled too much like fish and neither Sofie or I enjoyed that smell at ALL! After gagging through that small exhibit we headed for the polar bear exhibit.


We strolled around the rest of the very small zoo, then had the most expensive, yet worst peanut butter sandwich ever made! Luckily Sofie wanted a burger, so she was satisfied and happy. After noshing, we headed to the "children's zoo" part of Central Park Zoo. Pretty uneventful until Sofie and another child crashed into each other while jumping on the "spider web."


As I type this Sofie happily coloring in her new snake coloring book we acquired at Central Park Zoo shop. I'm chillin' waiting on Debra to return from her timeshare meeting. She agreed to do that so we could stay in a nice place for less money. :-)

Later that afternoon Sofie, Debra and I ventured out to Veselka, a Ukrainian restaurant that Debra and I ate at before we knew who Sofie was. Excellent food. I think I had a celebrity spotting. I'm about 99.9% sure that Chloë Sevigny sat next to us(for about 5 minutes, then she moved) at Veselka. She's currently in Big Love and was in Boys Don't Cry, among other cool movies. I would never go over to a celebrity, but I did stare...discreetly!! A very cool New York moment.

After a fine meal of pierogies, stroganoff and a raspberry blintz we headed towards the subway and made our way back to the hotel. (I'm glad I have a good internal sense of direction since the subway stop we were looking for was tucked away on a street that didn't exist from our originating point. I just went with my gut and we got there, no problemo!!)

After resting for a bit in the hotel, I headed towards Brooklyn to hang out with one of my college roommates, Bec. (Debra and Sofie went to see Mary Poppins on Broadway with tickets she'd gotten for free from the timeshare presentation) We seamlessly met in a Metro station and rode towards her neighborhood. We caught up a bit on the ride over and upon exiting the Metro station ran into a friend of hers. We chatted a bit, got a restaurant recommendation and the three of of walked down the street. Her friend left us as she walked to her barber and we continued on to Franny's, a somewhat upscale, yet not, Italian restaurant. We ate a wonderful meal outside, continued to chat about life as if we'd seen each other the day before. That's the quality of a good friend...even after not seeing them for awhile, you pick up as if you'd never been apart. It was a great evening just hanging out, catching up, seeing where she lived and declining a night out at the local lesbian bar! A HUGE "thanks" and a BIG hug to Bec for wonderful evening in her part of New York!

Tomorrow, Saturday, our friends Maya and Laurie arrive from Santa Cruz, CA and we'll all head over to the big boat! More entries later.

BEYOND excited

So, here we are, a week away from heading to NYC for a few days before our big family cruise!! To say that we're excited would probably be the biggest understatement of the year. This is coming from someone who NEVER thought she'd want to go on a cruise. I have to tell you though, I've heard so many wonderful things about RFamily cruises, that I can't imagine that it will anything less than incredible!

Preparing for this cruise has turned me into a bit of a creative monster!! For those who know me, you realize, I'm very LEFT brained analytical...I'm a librarian for gosh sakes! The creative bug bit me when someone mentioned door decorations and everyone on my obsession, The Forum, started piping up about decorating their doors. So I succumbed to my left brain rationale and have let my right brain have a little fun!! Now, those of you who may read this that are one the cruise...it ain't gonna be all that! In an odd way, it'll take my analytic side(the way the door decorations will be organized) and my creative side(what I've come up with to represent "r" family.) There's a guy on the cruise who is an AWESOME scrapbooker, so I expect his door will be incredible. Ours will be amusing, thought-provoking and informative...again, I am a librarian, so information is my thing! What I expect it to do is let people who are walking by get to know our family without needing to ask all the obligatory questions. I'll take pictures, so folks can see what I'm doing. Debra gave me full creative reign on this one!!

I'm bringing the laptop, so I intend to write daily about our adventures. I doubt I'll post daily because of costs. However, once we're back you'll get to experience our adventure from my blog AND Debra's.

Right now, we're just counting the days.

Beach blog

We celebrated the end of school/beginning of summer by taking a trip to the beach. We picked Sofie up from school on Friday afternoon and headed East to the beach. I was still disoriented from the new drug I'm taking for "inner ear" stuff, so I wasn't really in the mood to be in a car for several hours, but I did okay. We stopped once for a stretch/bathroom/food break and that was very appreciated.

We arrived a little later than I expected, but still got in before dark. Sofie wanted to go straight to the beach, but had to be patient while we unpacked. My feet were a little swollen from the lymphedema, so I rested/elevated my feet while Debra took Sofie out for beach time. When they got back in, we didn't feel like doing a restaurant, so we went to my Mom's place for ham sandwiches!! (She hadn't gone to the grocery store yet, but had sandwich makings!) It was perfect, no fuss, no muss. And Sofie got to see Nana Sue and her husband, Stan, for awhile.

An exciting thing occurred while we were there!! Sofie came over, sat in my lap and was wiggling one of her bottom loose teeth. I asked her if she wanted me to pull it. "Do you WANT to pull it out?" she asked. I told her I'd be happy too if she were ready. She said yes, so I grabbed a tissue, wrapped it around that tooth and tugged. She lost her first tooth!! She didn't even cry, although she admitted later that she almost did. :-) The tooth fairy visited later that evening, after she fell asleep. Unfortunately, our night was nowhere near over with!

Around 130a, I was still awake and couldn't get to sleep. Sofie was in my bed and very wiggly, so I tried to get her over to Debra's bed w/o too much fuss. Debra was sleeping soundly, so I figured it would be fine for both of them to sleep while I tossed and turned. Nope, that wasn't in the plans. Sofie woke up with an earache...a bad one. We tried to comfort her, but nothing worked, so an hour later we were in the car headed for the Emergency room at the nearest hospital. (You can probably read Debra's blog for details on that visit) It was a pretty quick visit. She was given antibiotics and Tylenol and we went back to the hotel for a few hours of sleep.

I admit, I was really cranky on Saturday. It was hot, I was very tired...did I mention it was HOT?!?! We went to the outlet mall near us and didn't really have a good time at all. Sofie didn't want to be there because it was too hot and boring...she definitely didn't get the shopping gene that Debra and I have!! So, her crankiness, combined with my crankiness...well, it didn't add up!! We stayed a little while, shopped a little bit, had lunch and headed back to the hotel/pool. When we got back I napped a little and Debra and Sofie rested/chilled in the cool hotel room. A little while later they headed down to the pool and I joined them shortly thereafter. We hung out by the pool for a long time. Debra read, I rested and got in the pool with Sofie. After a couple of hours, I went inside and Debra and Sofie went to the beach for a "few minutes." Those few minutes turned into over an hour!! Sofie, yet again, met a kid from our local area. She must have some sort of Triangle Radar!! It was good though.

We ate a lovely, filling dinner at a really good Mexican restaurant then went home and had a nice long evening of uninterrupted sleep. Next morning we packed, headed to my mom's for breakfast...yummy. Sofie and Debra fell asleep on one of her guest beds and I took a short nap on the other. When we all awoke, Debra and Sofie headed back to the beach for one more round of sun and sand. I hung out with Mom.

The trip home was uneventful, now I have to make good on my promise to myself to purge and get rid of old clothes and get my condo organized!!

Off to clean the fridge.

DC fun

It's been a while since I've posted. I was dealing with writer's block and an extremely busy life for a week or two. I'm back to reality and hopefully will post more regularly now.

This weekend, Debra, Sofie and I headed to DC for a fun weekend away. We started by visiting a former preschool classmate of Sofie, Alex and his family. It was great seeing them. Sofie and Alex played as if it had been no time at all since they'd seen each other, when in fact it had been 2 years. We stayed longer than anticipated and ended up having dinner with the family. All that meant that we were really late checking in to our DC hotel. That didn't really matter since we weren't really on a schedule.

We woke up Sunday morning, got ready and walked to the zoo. It was already hot and sticky by the time we arrived. Sofie complained about walking and she really wanted to get to the Reptile Discovery Center to view all the snakes. When we finally made it to the snakes, she was one happy child. The girls loves snakes! We kept walking through the zoo and got to the end, hoping to find a taxi waiting for us. No such luck, that particular exit isn't conducive to taxi's passing by, so we had to call one since I knew I was unable to walk anymore. My feet and legs were killing me and I just wanted to get to the hotel and rest! After waiting more than 1/2 hour for a taxi, we get back to the hotel, eat lunch and get ready to go poolside. It was crowded and this white girl needed some shade, so i swam with Sofie then laid in a chair UNDER my towel!! I know, freakish, but hey it's better than being sunburned.

Sofie had a great time in the pool, as she always does. She played by herself then met a girl her age dressed in an almost identical swimsuit! They played and laughed and jumped and had tons of fun. The really cool part is the little girl lives in Chapel Hill, so there are possibilities for future playdates!

On Sunday evening, while Sofie was still playing in the pool, a huge thunderstorm loomed in the heavens. We were going to go out to dinner and explore more of DC, but that didn't happen. Instead, we had room service and Sofie watched a movie. The next morning we got up, packed, ate breakfast and headed south. After driving through DC to get to proper highway, we headed for home. I had the bright idea of stopping at IKEA since we don't have one in Durham...or even in NC yet! We finally found IKEA, went inside and Sofie wanted to play in the area were kids hang out while parents shop. She had fun and Debra and I didn't have to hear her complain about how BORING IKEA was...silly child, she'll one day realize just how cool IKEA is.

After exhibiting enormous restraint and only buying a few things, we hopped in the car and headed for home. One quick stop at McDonalds so Sofie could add to her Shrek figurines collection and we're heading home. We finally got home around 6p, exhausted and ready to chill out. It was a fun weekend and now we're planning our trip to the beach the weekend school let's out for the summer. After that, a few more weeks to our CRUISE!!! Woohoo!

Christmas, Part 2

After leaving mom's, I headed NE(only slightly) to Stokesdale to help Daddy celebrate his 62nd birthday. I got there just in time for him to finish frying his turkey, grab some lunch and take a nap before the birthday festivities.

Daddy's birthday gathering/pre-Christmas festivities were celebrated at my step-mom's ex-husband's house. Yep, you read that right. Our family is a forgive and forget kind of family. When that first rolls off my tongue, it sounds odd, but it's kind of the way it should be. Debra and I are following along in those footsteps, therefore making Sofie's life easier. It works for everyone!

I won't go into a lot of the birthday festivities, because, let's just say, there are differing opinions about many topics that make me uncomfortable there. I just hang out and move from room to room to avoid any confrontational subject that occurs. The thing that amazed me most...they smoke...in their HOUSE!!! When we got back to my dad's, I quickly put everything I was wearing into a plastic trash bag and sealed that puppy up!

Next morning, Daddy, Shirley and I opened gifts and went to Huddle House for breakfast. This place is more redneck than Waffle House, something I didn't think possible. After waiting an hour for our food, we ate a mediocre meal and headed back to there place. I jumped in my car and started the hellish trip home in the pouring rain.

Got home in one piece and started my first meal in my newly acquired crock pot...Vegetarian Chili. Took it to a potluck that will be written about in my next posting!

Christmas, Part 1

Being that I am a only child from a divorced family, I often split time between families over the holidays. (That is unless I'm boycotting the holidaze and go see no one!)

Part 1, section A involved Christmas with Tracey and Sharon on a hectic, rainy Friday afternoon. Each respective unit was feverishly packing, running errands and planning our departure time for our Interstate drives. Initially we both were going to leave Friday afternoon, but as the day went on it became apparent a Saturday Morning departure was in our futures. We shared loving, thoughtful gifts. As some of you know already, I got a crock pot from Debra and Sofie for Christmas(per my request!) Sharon and Tracey must have known this, for present #1 was 101 Thing To Do With A Slow Cooker. The second part was the creme on the pot...they got all the dry ingredients for THREE of the recipes in the book! Sharon figured that if I had the ingredients, I'd have to use the crock pot. She was right, I used them Monday for a potluck I attended.(More on that in a later entry) Sharon, being the good friend that she is, also bought a cribbage board for me...unfortunately, being the absent-minded friend I am, I forgot to tell her I bought one already!

Part 1, section B involves spending time with my mom, a cousin, Maw Maw Lamkin(that's Grandma for the Southern challenged) and a slew of Aunt's(again, "ant", not "ahnt"!!) Also an impromptu stop by the daughter of a childhood friend of my mom's.

I awoke early on Saturday, began doing chores, packing up the car and heading South for Charlotte. I planned to stop at the Pilot Truck Stop/Gas Station on exit 152 on I85/I40. (This is where my dad's job has him bringing gas/fuel from Greensboro to this gas station ONLY about 4 times a day.) I knew Saturday morning was one of his days on, so I stopped, called him and found out he was 20 minutes away. I decided that even though it might put a crimp in my day with Mom, I'd stay and have breakfast with my Daddy. Boy, was he a big spender( we joked about this all weekend, so this not a dig at my dad by any means!!) I got free coffee, since he works for the company and we shared a 2 for $2 at the attached McDonald's. So he laid down a whopping &1.07 on his only child! And I love him for it. We chatted, caught up a bit. He rubbed my bald head and said the pictures didn't do it justice and that I look much better in person. His way of a compliment. I felt the time crunch approaching, hugged him and bid adieu.

I was on the road to my mom's house and my cell rings, "Where are you?!? It's 10:30!!" "Uh, on your road, turning into your driveway in moments" I guess my mom had reason since I told her I'd leave Durham at 6a...which I didn't do. Then I was waylaid at exit 152!! I arrived and within 20 minutes my cousin stopped by. We visited. She said she preferred the hat to my bald head. Uh, not your head, not your life and you try wearing a hat 24/7 and see how you like it!! But I digress. After her departure we headed over to Maw Maw Lamkin's house(yes, this the mother of my father who is no longer married to my mother. Trust me, this only gets better in my next installment!!)

We arrive at Maw Maw's house and I immediately smell a fresh pot of her famous Russian Tea! (I had called her the day before requesting it...and the recipe.) I gave her a huge Jamie hug, where she comes to just below my armpit. She sent us to the living room so she could call my aunts to let them know I was there. 2 of the 4 of them showed up. One was in the middle of something and the other didn't come because we were stopping by her house after leaving Maw Maw's.

I admit, I don't visit my grandma often enough. I love her to bits and she's the only grandparent remaining...although I've only been down to 1 grandparent for 5 years. I feel grateful that I had Maw Maw Bess live to 99 and Paw Paw Lamkin live to 83. (If you look at my bald photos, you can see what my Paw Paw looked like...there's a lot of him in me...at least being bald!) I'm going to try to visit her more often this year. I want Sofie to know and remember her, so it's important that she be around her more often.

After visiting with Maw Maw and my aunt's Kathy and Julia, Mom and I headed over to my most favorite aunt's house...Linda. Linda is a free spirit. She and I come from the same family and both created our own set of beliefs that were beyond the families. We listen to NPR, can chat about crystals and healing and other sorts of things I can't imagine talking about with most of my family. She recently moved back from CO, after being gone for at least 25-30 years. She bought a cute mill house in Cramerton(a little mill village in Gaston County) and has proceeded to gut it. When she finishes, it will be an incredibly cute house...and just what she needs!

While visiting her, we discussed planning a family reunion for the summer. Maw Maw's brother and sister-in-law live in Hayesville, NC and that's the area my dad was born and my grandparents were raised. My people are there in the beautiful mountains. Again, I'd like Sofie to meet them before they die and I'd love to see everyone in the same place, that's neutral and won't cause strife for any family drama! I'll do part of the planning, planting the seed and see how it blooms.

After leaving Linda's and heading back to Charlotte, we drove by the house of the daughter of one of my mom's best childhood friends. They lost the Husband/Dad a few days after Christmas last year to Prostate Cancer. They were out raking leaves, spending time together and really just taking it one day at a time until the Anniversary. Missy, the daughter, was very close to her dad...much like me. She's a lesbian, like me, too. Unlike me, her dad didn't speak to her for a while after she came out. That's always sad to me. I'm glad it all worked out and their relationship became what it was before the coming out. I'm glad we stopped by. It was great to see them and send them loving energy to have a better year.

Back to mom's we head for a wonderful home cooked meal and an afternoon/evening of watching cheesy Christmas movies on Lifetime. I went to bed on the early side, slept fairly well, until the heat came on and baked me out of the bed. Got up, had breakfast and headed to Christmas, Part 2 as my mom and her husband headed off to Christmas Eve service at her church.